I do not like this.........

I never faced this way...Coming to work on Monday morning and feeling real dull.But things are real bad these days.I am asked to do activities which are monotonous and require no use of brain.Its like writing impositions in school.I used to hate doing it.(I mean every hates to do) But its the repeatability part which I hate .I am not definitely happy with my work.I do not know how long will I continue with this kind of work.I know I will reach a stage soon when I will say it quit.No matter what happens...Just leave it.Life on personal front was never very cool. Its worse now. Do not know what is right. What is wrong? I feel I am doing right.I feel its good for all.I feel it has a happy ending. But clapping never happens with one hand. At the moment I am the "one hand" trying to reach for the other hand, which seems to be quite far... I chose it nevertheless.I asked for it. And I am not going to give up.If time is the only problem. I will give it some time.But I am not going to give up fast. I am not going to let go this time.I want this badly...this badly. And someone told if you want something this bad , you will get it. Its matter of how much I want this to happen. It is a commitment for life.I know the dangers, I know the hurdles.The deadliest of all is to break my heart which got fixed very recently. But I chose this path.Strength to strength...trust to trust...